●● Crucifying KaЯmina BuЯana ●●

Yesterday wasn't Friday and I wasn't in love

2012-02-15T14:14:00.001-04:30

Just went out with friends to have some dessert for Valentine’s day. and had an oreo milkshake of course.

And then! I got a cheesecake and french fries… So far, I’d have called a good night.

Here with my hommie in Valentine’s day. Forever alone hell yeah!

Nape

2012-02-13T22:23:00.001-04:30

Wearing a scarf at home so my mom doesn’t see my new piercing in the back of my neck.

And this is what I did today :D

And then I got some twistos and cookies! So, this was a great day!

You're kidding me, right?

2012-02-13T21:33:00.002-04:30

Now I’m supossed to be doing the Notre Dame cathedral on a hat for one of my little cousin’s school asigments. Kill me now.

Speechless

2012-02-12T11:52:00.000-04:30

On Saturday my cello teacher made me sing the notes while she played it on the piano… now I’m completely mute.

Yes, I did

2012-02-11T14:15:00.000-04:30

Yesterday. I am just bitter because no men likes me ever… I really don’t know why. It makes me mad, not sad anymore. So I drank until I threw up.

Graduation day

2012-02-09T02:08:00.000-04:30

Today was my friend's graduation. It was nice, I thougth the ceremony was gonna get into my nerves since I had to had my degree more than a year ago... but it was even a little boring.

I am happy for my friend, this is an oportunity for her to recognize it's time to grow up and take control of her life now, she owns her entire life now. I really hope everything works out for her; even if we're getting different kinds of people now that we're completely adults, I really wish her well.

Her dad invited us for lunch (only because he wanted to compete with the mom of my friend, they're divorced). We went to a nice restorant and I had a big nice meal... call me silly but I really enjoyed my green spaghetti and my frappe lemonade.

Then he took us, all six ot us, for dessert. We had this delicious chocolate cake with cherries. After all, he realize that it was his daugther's graduation day, a one thing in a life time event... sort of...

So, basically, it was a good day (I mean this first part of the day at least).

I took a "nap" (I couldn't actually sleep because my mother was sewing in my room... with a sewing machine) and then dolled myself up. You never know who you're going to meet, right? Well, in my case is always NOBODY; but a little hope doesn't kill.

Or maybe in fact does.

Because we have planned reuniting again at noon, we went to this cool place calles 360. So called because it's located in a rooftop and you have a 360 degree view of the city. It was quite beautiful. The thing that this is a very dark place... literally dark. Our tiny table was lighted only by a candle. This in when everything started to go wrong for me because the whole atmosphere was to dam romantic for eleven people gathered around a little coffee table.Anyhow, a had a couple cosmos and my brother and I ate a motherfucking tiny and expensive (of course) pizza.

But this is no issue, the thing is that my friend and I have been becoming different kinds of people lately; I get bored to death everytime I hang out with her and her friends, we're just too different. As a matter of fact, my friend's sister said to me that they consider me a hater because I just treat them with indiference, now this was a little surprise to me because I don't consider myself a hater at all... but them I realize that I do treat them with indiference on purpose because I really don't like them... I don't even hate them, we're just too different.I say this everytime I got out with my friend, and every single time I promise I won't hang with them anymore... but I keep doing it. I can't really believe my friend doesn't know I don't like her new friends, so she's really in denial and keeps inviting me to spend time with them. She's just trying too hard.

And this is the last time; I pinky swear.

But why

2012-02-08T21:18:00.002-04:30

Tomorrow is one of my best friends graduation from college... at 11:00 am; and that's not the only thing that annoys me, but the fact that I had to go to the University that kicked me out almost two years ago. I should have my degree by now... and going there pisses me the fuck off. I can't help it. And I hate fucking graduations. I don't want to go!

Also in the nigth she wants to go for dinner (great! spending more money I don't have!) and then she's having a party at her house... fuck my life. I can't help be stressed out just by thinking in spending some hours with her dumb umbearable loser friends.

So, tomorrow I'm gonna be drunk... better if I start at 11 am.

I’ve been feeling weird lately

2012-02-08T01:52:00.001-04:30

and by weird I mean depressed as fuck.

Bye bye long nails

2012-02-07T00:00:00.000-04:30

My cello teacher said they need to go.

Life itself

2012-02-06T23:15:00.003-04:30

One of my best friends is pregnant... she's delivering in the last week of March, and she's scared to death. I don't even know what I'm looking at, but is a girl.

And... that's all I have to say about that.

Almost new

2012-02-05T14:05:00.001-04:30

This is how my hair looks after the treatment I had made last wednesday. It feels lighter and softer, I kinda like it… now I have to buy some expensive product wich supposedly it’s going to make it look better.

Hard day

2012-02-02T21:51:00.000-04:30

My cousin woke me up at 9 am because he needed me to do some homework for his sons… It figures. It was something like a negative or a positive figure, they didn’t even know. So I made what I thought it could be: a siluette of a castle and like a stencil of a house.

I’m such a fucking good cousingn and he’s so mean to me…

And then I baked this fucking awesome lemon pie… I can’t wait to taste it… It’s just beautiful.

And then I made all of this for the party my aunt invented out of nowhere because she’s bored…

And I made a lot of salads... I'm tired, man.

Feeling weird

2012-02-01T21:17:00.001-04:30

This is my hair now. I haven’t straighten it in maybe 8 years or so… I’ll show you all of it later… I really REALLY don’t like it that much.

*Time later*

So, this is me with straight hair… I am not sure if I like it or not… I think my head look strange, and I really miss the mess and the volume. But anyway, this is until the product of the treatment I had made settle down. If it works soon I’ll have big curls instead of little stutborn ones.

What do you think? Straight or curly?

Today my aunt got me a pentagram notebook and some wax for my cello bow!

2012-01-30T21:36:00.000-04:30

Why am I so excited…

I don't thin I'm very good at this

2012-01-29T17:46:00.000-04:30

I am supposed to be practicing my rythm with this?! This is inhuman… wish me luck.

WTF

2012-01-28T00:53:00.001-04:30

I just fucking hate when you're supposed to meet somebody somewhere they're not familiar with and they don't have a motherfucking cellphone.

Like... really... how the fuck you do not own a goddamn cellphone. I'm not even talking about a smart phone, and iPhone or a Blackberry or shit... NO. Just some device to keep you in touch with the human race.

Now when the fuck I'm supposed to know you arrived or how the fuck am I supposed to find you in a place you don't even know and why you don't even care if you get fucking lost. I worry about that, you little piece of shit!

I'm just gonna sit here in the dark and eat this huge chocolate truffle to calm myself down.

People, seriously...

Countdown

2012-01-27T22:21:00.002-04:30

The girl that was supposedly going to give me classes tomorrow dissapeared. ready to curse her name and her family in 3… 2… 1…

I may need teratment

2012-01-26T21:15:00.000-04:30

I keep spending money… Yes, I have a problem, I know. I bougth expensive things I don’t need from Avon, and got a new bow for my cello, THAT I DO NEED, tho.

For the first time in my life

2012-01-25T02:04:00.001-04:30

Today my family and I spent the whole evening at the funeral house, to farewell my cousin's mother who died of neumonia after a sexi year strugglw with cancer. Honestly, I didn't cry because of that poor woman's death, for she left before her pain was umbearable, so she didn't suffer greatly.

But watching my 15 year old cousin crying and screaming because he wanted his mother with him cracked me up so hard, that I had to leave for a while and cry on my uncle's shoulder. I can't even think of what he's going through.

I was so exhausted I fall sleep at 9, now it's 2 am... I just woke up.

I don't even know a tune

2012-01-24T01:29:00.002-04:30

This is what I've been doing lately... yes, making a fool of myself because I suck. Starting classes soon, tho.

R.I.P.

2012-01-23T22:39:00.000-04:30

Today the mother of my cousin died, she had cancer in every part of her body. But that didn't killed her, all her debts kept her working hard and constantly... so she couldn't take good care of herself. Her family did not support her or help her very much... and one day she got neumonia, and stop eating. She look like a living corpse, I swear. Yesterday she kept seeing patients since she was an ortodoncist.

She was so weak and fragile. This mornign she was taken to the clinic where she could barely speak. Her body couldn't bare the neumonia, at 1pm she died.

(Picture above: my cousing and her mom)

TAKE MY BODY

2012-01-22T01:56:00.000-04:30

El olor del metal sinfónico: Pseudo crónica de una noche Apocalyptica

Friday night: Beer and Twistos

2012-01-21T21:35:00.002-04:30

Just came back from Apocalyptica’s concert

2012-01-20T01:06:00.003-04:30

I’m tired and eating a sandwich. It was AWESOME, a little short, but still, fucking awesome.

I love you, Eicca. I love you, Paavo.

I’m moving to Finland.Now, off to a shower.

Off to see Apocalyptica

2012-01-19T12:00:00.000-04:30

I know it’s noon, but the location it’s kinda far and I have to make line… so… I'm encourage but still it’s gonna be a long day.

I'm not in the US but...

2012-01-18T01:49:00.003-04:30

Debts

2012-01-17T22:38:00.000-04:30

Just came from my best friend house… And her mom sells by catalogs, of course I spent money I don’t have in silly pretty things… I even ordered more things! At least I get to use my new Jack’s agenda, it’s kinda ~~funny~~ sad that all I have written on it are merely debts. Oh, my life…

I really NEED these glasses!!!

2012-01-16T22:44:00.000-04:30

No… you don’t understand: I REALLY NEED THEM.

Mama's birthday!

2012-01-14T15:57:00.000-04:30

I made cheese fondue… I forgot to get white wine, so I had to cook with red one… Now that got strangely looking, fucking delicious and fucking weird!

So… Salads, fondue, chocolate cake and wine for everybody since I can’t really cook. Nobody complained, in fac, I even got congratulations for the dinner!

A day for my mother's birthday

2012-01-13T18:11:00.004-04:30

Already made my mom’s irthday cake for tomorrow… it’s of chocolate, with chocolate… and some chocolate with chocolate on top…

This year my taste has change a little maybe?

2012-01-12T17:30:00.001-04:30

Michael Fassbender

William Fitchner

Peter Murphy

Hugh Laurie

Christoph Schneider

Tom Hiddleston

Tilo Wolff

Julian Sands

Skinny mysterious man... oh, my...

Little black flowers

2012-01-11T00:00:00.000-04:30

Some mom’s coworked sent me this cute earings as a late Christmas present. That’s very thougthfull since my mother gave her daugther a fucking huge castle for hamsters or something like that… Still, I like them.

Late nite again

2012-01-10T03:30:00.000-04:30

I drank two frappe mocachinnos and I’m playing with make up at 3:30 am… my left eyelid is ticking. Forbit me to drink coffe (and use shimer) ever again, please.

Designer impass

2012-01-09T00:01:00.000-04:30

Yesterday I went to my friend's Fefy's because she was so stressed out about her homework delivery. She have to sew almost an entire outfit, and as she didn't do any of it in her Christmas vacations, she had to, of course, do it all the day before.

So she called me in despair only for me to make her company, otherwise she would have gone mad. So I made her company and help her by painting two metters of lace... with a brush... and acriclic painting... gawd help me.

Her desgns are inspired on a Francis Bacon painting.

That's why I had to paint the lace, she never found the specific fabric she needs yo sew her dresses.

Gucking amazing desings. She's so talented. I love her. I'm so jelous.

So I help her and busted my back since I spent more than three hours painting fabric on her living room floor. For the work she paid me with cookies... and I'm ok with that.

Then I helped her some more making her dinner. Cute little Fefy^^

Dangerous shopping

2012-01-08T00:59:00.000-04:30

My mom and her hoarding problems have find a new seasonal friend: January bargains. She went to the mall today and bougth presents for everyone she intents to keep until "the right time". This scares me a little bit, but I EXPECT she's not keeping those things 'til next december.

Maybe to keep my mouth shot she bought me a powder brush, some skull stickers and a tiger ring... Ok, I'll take the presents, but I'm still not ok with this!

(Last nigth I...)

2012-01-07T16:59:00.002-04:30

My internet connection is fucking with my nerves... I'm on the rage stage right now.

The good thinf is that my brother is at some party and I'm satying in hiss room tonigth, so I get to watch TV since mine broke a couple of weeks ago. But as I'm disconected from life I have been in the so bored real world: I did some laundry at 10 pm, then watched a Jean Claud Van Damme movie, then re aranged my uncle's DVD collection (it's maybe a thousen copies), listened (and danced to) some electro goth music for a while, there's nothing on TV but Jason X and now I'm drinking some home iced-mocachino at 2 am in my new vintage-like cup... This nigth is fucking killing me.

Thank gawd for smart phones.

Here I come, Eicca!

2012-01-07T00:00:00.000-04:30

Today I spent ALL of my money left. My brother and I bougth tickets for Apocalyptica and then we dine this ridiculous expensive pizza. Now I have the money to live confortably for the rest of my life... that is if I die tomorrow.

Anyhow, Apocalyptica, here I come! Eicca, I'm getting you soon! I told y brother to smile because we had finally get our tickets (we went to two other places before), and he did that. He seems disturbinly happy.

In debt already

2012-01-06T00:35:00.001-04:30

Yesterday I went to some college friend house to have lunch. It was a good time. And her mother sells by catalogue, and of course, I had to buy... no, you don't understand, I HAD TO. Anyway, at least I already got my mother's birthday present (January, 14th): a couple of losions for her feet, and I got to vintage looking cups and a yummy mint spray. If I'm buying my ticket to go see apocalyptica, I'm gonna be broke forever then

Be very jelly

2012-01-05T22:19:00.002-04:30

Yesterday my cusin turned 20 years old, I made her a cake with cocoa powder and chocolate. It taste like heaven, and I'm about to eat a big piece of it.

Carmín

2012-01-04T20:55:00.000-04:30

Eating cherrys and paiting my nails tacky red. How redundant I am.

2011 in moments

2012-01-03T00:07:00.000-04:30

Let’s see… last year a lot of things happened that I can actually remember. So I’m making a countdown because it’s rare that I can even recall events in my life.

10) I met and hung out with a lot of new and awesome people. Specially with my brother’s good friend. He came back from Germany and now he’s expecting the papper work to move out for good. We’ve been close lately.

9) Went to the biggest theatre in my city for the first in my life to watch Cabaret, and some time later to watch the circus Viaggio by Il Circo.

8) Finally delivered my fucking thesis at fucking last.

7) Learned to swim.

6) Went to a doctor to learn how to eat and worked out regularly to have a better life style.

5) Got really drunk for the first time some time this year... and then several times some tome after.

4) Had an awesome vacation trip with my family for the first time in more than 12 years.

3) Had my tongue pierced.

2) Lost a lot of weight and now I'm under 98 Kg. fot yhe first time in I don't even know how many years.

1) And the first place goes to my spine surgery. Because it was the most drastic shit I had to got trought the last year. I wasn't that dramatic but it meant that I had to change my life style forever... and it left me a pretty huge scar in my lower back.

New year's eve

2012-01-02T21:39:00.000-04:30

This is me just having a little fun at our party.

This New Year’s Eve was different than the past ones, I couple of friends stayed with us. This is a little rare for our family and in our country, I dare to say. December festivities are costumed to be expent in family.

I wouldn’t even think about not being with my family in these important dates. And I see them almost everyday.

This year for the first time I got to use this sort of dress. I have never have wore a dress before. So I'm pride of this, even if it's not the most flattering for my body shape.

2012-01-01T16:40:00.003-04:30

I had a little strange feeling about this new year’s eve, deep inside and itch of conciousnes about the mess of my life remained alive burning softly. I deliverly wanted to ignored because I had a big, A BIG, sense of hope that everything would work out for me the upcoming year. The negatively behaviour of my mind about being miserable every December 31th was absolutely denied, and I had a really nice and happy welcoming of the 2012. But a glimpse of that mysery that my life is by nature was represente by a small tickle in my gut that gave me the ramdom idea I was going to diw in the new year’s eve. The mind has its own weird ways to mess with oneself.

So far, this first day of this new year… I have made a good friend cry, made think to some strange that maybe I’m a hysteric bitch, a friendship of 10 years is maybe coming to an end. and found out finally that y crush new all along that I like and he never did anything about it (Now of course I have no interest on that guy, I honestly don’t want to be friends. The main thing for me it’s not that he doesn’t like me at all, but the fact that I made a huge ridicule this whole time). Nothing have change, hope has die and I feel like the biggest stupid ever. I’ve never felt this way in my entire life.

Thank you 2012, fuck you already

Light the spirit up

2011-12-31T06:44:00.005-04:30

I just came from a pre-new-year’s-eve-reunion, in where my buddy’s 10 year old sister gave me a late Christmas present. This is just fucking cute. They’re obviously paper flowers made by her taped to pencils with the message “Dream it! Do it!”. ADORABLE. Inside the little bag are three mini scented home made candles, I just can’t even <3

Nuts

2011-12-30T19:01:00.001-04:30

Now I’m breaking nuts to do a nutty chocolate cake since I have no idea how to bake a Christmas cake.

Pistachios!! Yay!

I meesed up my chocolate cake, but this one turned out fine!

Gifts Pt.1

2011-12-28T18:37:00.004-04:30

This is what my mom got me for Christmas… would you really say she knows me well, yes?

This is what my brother gave me. A speaker for my iPod, yay!!

This all the jewelry I got. A bracelet from an aunt, a pair of rings from one of my best friends and another aunt, a key chain from my mom, and a pair of earing from my other best friend.

Pepito de pernil, hell yeah!

2011-12-26T18:48:00.002-04:30

Yesterday I went to my friend’s Christmas dinner. Very lovely. We needed a quiet nigth to chill together.

We even exange presents.My dear friend got me an absolutely adorable ring and my other best friend got me a pair of earings.

Lovely evening was lovely.

LOOK AT THIS MOTHERFUCKING DITA VON TEESE PAINTING! Look at ti! Look at this mother fucking painting that @Inmelman gave me for Christmas. I love it.

Me on our Christmas eve party!

2011-12-26T18:28:00.000-04:30

I love me. What can I say.

Party on

2011-12-25T15:27:00.000-04:30

Nice Christmas party, after midnigth some friends came over and everybody got drunk. Posting presents soon!

Christmas eve

2011-12-24T15:25:00.000-04:30

Off to my family’s Christmas party… that is in my house… so I may return soon anyway… Happy holydays to everyone or whatever!

Oh my prince...

2011-12-23T15:29:00.000-04:30

Got a pretty new BB case

2011-12-22T23:38:00.002-04:30

I must ostop giving Christmas presents to myself.

Jackie-O or Truman Capote?

2011-12-18T15:13:00.001-04:30

My new two favorite fragances

2011-12-17T15:11:00.000-04:30

Cook day

2011-12-16T19:37:00.000-04:30

Ready to bake. Today is my uncle’s birhtday, so I’m baking cupcakes. Then I have to cook dinner… Is going to be a long day.

Dinner took longer than expected. I'm exhausted.

And the cake is a mountain of cinnamon, lemon and vanilla cupcakes… Time for shower now. I’m done.

How can he be so perfect?

2011-12-15T23:14:00.000-04:30

Brand new

2011-12-14T15:50:00.001-04:30

Check out my new avon sparkly silver eye liner! Just practicing for my drag queen career.

Super green

2011-12-13T05:54:00.000-04:30

Coming back home from my hommie’s. I’m drunk and eating a green apple. Not feeling good at all.

Today I hung out with my hommies

2011-12-12T23:50:00.000-04:30

I love this crazy bitches.

Jerbo

2011-12-11T22:13:00.000-04:30

Now I made mouse little ears.

My life is pointless...

Bittersweet

2011-12-10T01:46:00.001-04:30

This sumerize better last nigth dinner of my friend’s birthday. Maybe I was kinda bitter; but people should not ask to taste my dessert.

Disposable past (at least for me)

2011-12-09T22:32:00.006-04:30

Yesterday I was doing some clean-up at 3 am… and I found some old pictures from me in primery school…

And a bunch of lost scissors…

I also found a few of my old diaries...

Yes, I admit it. I was the kind of girl who kept a diary (I still am).

But I think my diary entries were kinda different. I loved to make collages... I even threw away two full bags of gargabe from all the things I had kept to make collages...

I even threw the diaries. Never looked back. Thank gawd for the internet.

I even found this from when I wanted to be a fashion designer. Oh, sweet childhood.

Lo! This a gala night

2011-12-08T23:59:00.000-04:30

Just came back from my best friend dinner party for his birthday. I can’t quite endure what’s going on between me and my friends. Meaning that I feel awkard and half way bored to death when I’m with them. I love them, don’t get me wrong, but it wasn’t really a fun gathering.

I had this huge chicken salad... just spending more money I don't have.

Meow!

2011-12-07T01:31:00.002-04:30

Making myself useful again (meaning making kitty ears)… Maybe somebody will buy something.

I made tree complete ears (two white and one in black) and three pairs of ear-clips. I already got a buyer, yay!

People shoul buy from me! My ears are a total bargain for this Christmas!

Could it be?

2011-12-06T19:03:00.001-04:30

My cousing gave this huge feather brooche… I love it, but maybe it’s too big?

Spiders and owls

2011-12-05T17:54:00.001-04:30

This morning I went to have a quick breakfast with my two friends from college. We catchd up, we had fun, we even planned a lunch. It was a good morning…

I even got early Christmas presents from my two friends.

Early

2011-12-05T01:39:00.000-04:30

I’m supposed to be having a breakfast with a couple of friends from college… I SO not want to…

Passport

2011-12-04T16:45:00.000-04:30

Yesterday I went to my recently hommie’s to, supposedly, watch some movies. But my friend forgot to tell me his DVD player was broke. So much for that. So we took some board games of his little sister and played for hours… you can actually have fun qith anything as long as you’re with your friends. His mom passed by a couple of of time just looking at us with this “What a bunch of loser” face. I am, what can I say.

It was a good night since I ate two massive pieces of cheesecake. I could be happier.

We did watched Martyrs in his laptop while we all were cuddle together in his bed.What the real fuck… that fucking movie… I can’t even… But then we tried to watch something happier like Over the Top but my brother couldn’t held a havey fart and then we had to run away ‘til dawn.

Fast disaster

2011-12-03T17:24:00.000-04:30

Disastrous week... I ate a huge load of chinesse food at 2 am while watching The Village for 100th time.

Is coming

2011-12-02T16:46:00.000-04:30

You know Christmas is near when your grandma tells you have to make her like a hundred artesanal envelops by hand. The good part is that I’m sure now she’s giving money as presents.

Breathe in

2011-12-01T17:00:00.001-04:30

I already got my outfit for this year Christmas party at home: Skinny jeans that my mom never wore, old black boots given by my cousin (I restore them) and a new purple shirt… I still think something’s missing… maybe a huge belt. I tried with this corset but I can’t really breathe much.

Remember when

2011-11-29T17:42:00.000-04:30

Tre-60

2011-11-28T02:56:00.000-04:30

Today I was in one of my brother’s band rehersal. I took some pictures and videos… now for some strange reasons they call me manager.

Jimador

2011-11-26T20:34:00.000-04:30

Yesterday I hung out with my new friends... I still don't feel like even seeing my old ones. We drank tequila and I'm still feeling miserable... it was a good tequila. Everybody is kinda mad wuth the guy I like, so we didn't ivite him. Now I gotta figure out how to make things up with him again. He still doesn't like me and I haven't gave up hope. I'm such a loser.

Treats

2011-11-24T19:38:00.000-04:30

Yesterday I went shopping for christmas presents… but then I sent everything to hell and got some bracelets and a turtle ring for me.

My cousin gave me her old boots she never wore… it’s renovation time!!

Came back... not for long

2011-11-22T20:14:00.002-04:30

My mom just came from her bussines trip in Mexico... and sometimes I do like her terrible condition of shopoholic. And she said she didn't had enougth time to hang out. Lucky me.

She even got me some pretty cool tights... now, I don't wear tights, but let's see if I can pull some outfit up. Tons of exfoliant sopa she stole form her hotel and some makeup. I really need a small set of eyeshadow that I could carry in my purse.

Now I have a huge bottle of mexican tequila that I have to drink... Oh, damn...

I am such a happy freak.

Could be better

2011-11-21T21:59:00.001-04:30

Last Saturday, my friend Elías, my brother and I went to a party at their drummer’s house. It was baaad… specially because of the zone she lives in, very insecure. But the thing is, if you’re going to have a party why don’t you have enough drink for everybody, enough food, or even enough glasses. If you don’t care to host a party maybe you should not have one! I don’t care about the fact that the elevator was broken in the building… but girl… at least clean your house.

Anyway, the good things were the music…and the other people really like to dance so I dance a lot, and I mean, A LOT. I even picked up some german girl, haha, I was flattered because she was a gorgeous, tall, blonde girl. But thank you, no thank you. I would have rather a gorgeous german guy, but you know how life hates me.

This sigth is preposterous

2011-11-19T14:45:00.001-04:30

Yesterday I was with a friend and my brother at the Institute, then we went for some dinner…. when we came back to the car, my friend had left the lights on and the battery was dead. None of us know shit about batteries, engines or cars in general. We stood there for almost three hours til’ his dad came to help us at 10 pm.

Hey guise... he doesn't like me...

2011-11-17T01:58:00.000-04:30

2011-11-16T20:30:00.001-04:30

Coming fromt he doctor. He told me I was perfect after four months of my spine surgery. I finally can stop wearing thiss tupid corset! Yay!!!

I kinda like my scar O.O

NOT COOL AT ALL

2011-11-13T21:03:00.002-04:30

Yesterday I wen to to my crush's house because "suppossedly" there was going to be a party... It was a bad night... bad, bad night. This cookies (baked by my his sister) were the best thing about the whole NON-party.

This is what my crush did the whole night... while me and other friends were talking. Particularly I was drinking and dancing by myself. At some point I just sat in a dark corner to drink... for hours... he never looked at me.

I felt so fucking dissapointed and sad. Fuck my fucking life.

As the nigth had been such a completely waste of time, and i was so emotionally unstable... I took a picture of myself inside his bathtub. I was drunk, that's all.

I was wearing a little black dress for him!!! A fucking super short dress, and he didn't even told me I was cute. I'm still so fucking pissed off... REALLY.

And this is what I wrote at 3 am when I arrived home:

This time I really had a sparkle of hope. I dreamed about you noticing me and even falling for me. I dreamed it all. But know you saw me and everything went straighy yo hell… them why did you wanted to see me today? To show me your totall caress of interest? To tell me to my face all the other girls you want to fuck? To ignored me?

I love my brother, I really do. But I’m tired everybody exchanging me for his friendship. What’s wrong with me? I am not really worth it? I didi everyhting for calling your attention tonigth, and you just ditch me.

I just hope I wake up tomorrow with not a single slice of interest in you. I’m done with the 20 year old and guitar players. Fuck you all. Maybe if life told me already that I’ll ve alone for all eternity and gave up every hope on humanity this would be so much more fucking easy.

I just can’t even cry anymore.

It could be worse, yes?

2011-11-12T21:57:00.000-04:30

This is me in my speedo in swimming lessons.

Why is my make-up is perfect when I’m just playing with it bored at home

2011-11-11T00:01:00.000-04:30

Why!

Maybe I’ll go like this to class tomorrow… too much?

My mom is off to Mexico for twelve days

2011-11-10T17:55:00.000-04:30

You cannot have an idea of the immensity of happiness I’m experimenting right now.

I NEED THIS

2011-11-09T02:19:00.001-04:30

I'm a Sim

2011-11-08T22:08:00.000-04:30

And this is my friend being a Sim while texting. So today we were hanging at my crush’s house, just chating and being silly (and eating, as always).

So what did I do at my crush’s house? I did him a makeup as Frank N’ Further. And he liked it.

Of course this in my mind was a little more personal, and just the two of us… it migth have been involve a kiss eve… but we were surrounded by my brother, his sister and other friend. Oh, bugger!

Ache

2011-11-06T14:54:00.002-04:30

Yesterday was a fucking busy day. I got up early to go swiming, I had tu hurry because my brother was suppossed to have a gig at noon. But when I got there, their schedule was changed and they ended up playing at 6 pm. So I stayed all afternoon sitting on the floor of this disgusting location.

We arrived home maybe at 8pm, an hour later we were leaving again to my friend birthday party... it was raining and we stood under the rain for half an hour. I really loved how I was wearing (you can't really notice int he picture but I was wearing boots, leggins, a mini white dress, and my new old favorite sweater) because I NEVER dress like this.

I knew my friend's party was going to be bad... but I understimate how her friends can be so fucking boring and annoying. Some of them played Wii all nigth long, ALL NIGHT LONG.

My brother was so tired he went to sleep early, so I was left alone in the middle of all those losers.

I really had no intention to drink, but there was a turning point in the party when they started arguing because they couldn't agree on a Pokemon color.

Time to start drinking for me. Time to get wasted. And so I did.

(The good part is that she cookes for us: lasagna, chicken, tajaditas and salad.)

My adorable friend made us truffles. I hate them, but those one where so fucking good. For real.

The cute part is that she still keeps on her bed the little dolls I used to sew.

24th

2011-11-04T21:54:00.002-04:30

Yesterday was my best friend 24th birthday. We and other couple of friends wen to her house... I haven't been there since her last birthday the years before. Her mother is a really difficult person, and last nigth was a perfect ocassion to prove that. My friend lost it, and even include me in one od those figths, I was furious that she put me in that possition in public... so, inpublic as well, I told her I was pissed...

Anyhow, the food was great, my friend cooked for us carbonara pasta, and then we ate cake.

Althought all the troubles, we had fun. Everybody left before midnigth because of the tenssion, but me and my brother stayed. We had to sleep on the floor, and because of my condition and maybe because I'm too damn old for it, I couldn't sleep one bit, and still my spine and legs really hurt.

But I did really enjoy my outfit. Oh, narcissism.

My mom is heading to Mexico next week so I made emergency shoppings

2011-11-03T00:38:00.000-04:30

My love for P. Exeter Blue is back

2011-11-02T02:18:00.000-04:30

It's kinda funny my crush looks a little bit like him. How sad my life is.

2011-11-01T18:26:00.001-04:30

Story of my life.

Happy Halloween

2011-10-31T23:05:00.001-04:30

My mom bought me fake tattoos today. Do you think she would get mad if I tell her she’s giving me ideas?

My mom is shopoholic, and sometimes I just don't know if it's a good or a bad thing.

We don't really celebrate Halloween here, although I really like how I was dressed today.

But if we would, I'd love to be a La Catrina! Let's hope my best friend birthday is Halloween themed.

She turns 24 a day after El día de los muertos.

Halloween mash

2011-10-30T16:48:00.001-04:30

My Magenta costume was a total failure. However I had a great time yesterday. Even made a new friend. Today I'm just fucking depressed. Fuck evertbody, honestly.

5K

2011-10-28T16:52:00.000-04:30

I went to the nutricionist, and in almost a month I have lost 5 Kg. Even with all the pizza, burgers and booze consumed lately. So I celebnrate by eating chocolate cake a a bag of Cheetos.

That awkward moment when Jude Law is prettier than you

2011-10-27T23:24:00.001-04:30

Today was y uncle’s birhtday

2011-10-26T01:01:00.000-04:30

So I bake him a chocolate cake and cupcakes!

This is my first attempt of a La Catrina makeup for another Halloween party

2011-10-25T18:23:00.000-04:30

It's just a major mess.

It wasn’t really that chilly today, I just wanted to wear my new scarf

2011-10-24T20:52:00.001-04:30

On Sunday

2011-10-23T22:27:00.000-04:30

I just arrived home from another gig of my brother’s band. It was ok, not really great because of the shitty backline they hired. In another news, I think my crush kissed me one the lips by mistake when he we were saying goodbye. I say “I think” because it happened so damn fast… I do really think it was a mistake, a simple misplaced of lips. But he did asked me if I arived well at home. So… I better not oerthink this anyway (all of this is so complicated because it’s one of my brother’s good friends).

In another news I woke up ridiculously early for a Sunday. So, as it was my uncle’s birthday, I decided to bake lemon cupcakes because they’re his favorites.

AND my mom surprised me today finishing my Magenta costume for Halloween! Yay!

Friday night

2011-10-22T19:42:00.001-04:30

Yesterday, while I was in my englics classes, my brother's best friend asked if I wanted to do something at nigth. I said it was a bit complicated because I was arriving home after 9:00 pm; but then he said he was going to be picking me up from my house as soon as I arrived. This is still very strange to me, so much interest, when I barely go out with them.

So, I arrived home and then I got a call from this guy, the one I have a crush on, from my brother's cellphone; and he told me they were on their way. I have this tiny funny idea that maybe he was the one who had the idea of inviting me. I wouldn't really know.

We gathered, listened to music, sang, chat, and drank. we were kinda drunk. I was hoping something "special" happened... but nothing happened, at all. He did nothing. Now I guess is because it was me, him and my brother... till dawn.

When it was time to leave there was a heavy rain going on, I was freezing, but then he gave me his sweater and then hugged me. Talk me about having mixsignals from a guy like he's a little bitch.